Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Gawker et al.: We are indeed here, and yes, we're also queer.

It is so not even worth my time to try to go through this post from Gawker and point out all the places it goes wrong. Its problematic assertions can easily be countered with facts from things like the Wikipedia article on bisexuality, or any "Bi 101"-type information. Gawker readers and commenters could also try reading the list of bisexual people, which includes famous bi men. Wow! Those things sure were hard to find! </sarcasm>

I'm just going to say, as a bisexual female who is also VERY queer (and very active in queer communities), I truly do not appreciate some dude saying that I and other bisexuals are "basically just straight people who like to get a little funky." I am not the exception to the rule, either. I am one of so many.

And, on behalf of all my male-identified friends who are attracted to more than one gender, I'm outraged that this post was even published in the first place.

It's gross and offensive to me that a post like this would be written during this time, during the month of our pride. This is the time to celebrate our diversity, not to put it down. It is especially disgusting considering the recent reports that have surfaced regarding the murder of a bisexually-identified man in Iran. Funny, I guess the Iranian authorities didn't feel he was "basically just [a] straight [person]."

The validity of male bisexuality was also discussed on The View this week. If you are paying any attention to the way those conversations often go when in the hands of the uneducated and unqualified, you probably won't be surprised to learn that the discussion was not a positive one. See more about that show, and GLAAD's response, here.

Posts like the one from Gawker, shows like The View, and unthinkable actions like those of the Iranian security forces are exactly why we need to keep marching. Why we need to keep writing our complaints. Why we need to do everything we can to stay vocal and visible.

Sometimes, all the work is simply exhausting. There were several of us who busted our butts working to get things ready for the bi/pan/queer contingent at the Columbus Pride Parade this past Saturday. I'm still catching up on sleep. The morning of the parade, it was raining and humid. As soon as we started marching, the sun came out, and it got really hot. All of the work, all of the weather, it was all worth it. I have marched in Columbus Pride for the past three years, and I have paid careful attention to the reaction of the crowd. Stony faces on the part of some gays, but others applaud and cheer when they see us. What makes it the most worth it for me is the people who see our colors, who see our message of visibility and love, and see themselves represented. Bisexuals watching the parade will see us and start jumping up and down and screaming and saying, "THAT'S ME! I'M BISEXUAL! THAT'S ME!"

There are so many reasons to march. I walk for all my pleasantly surprised bisexuals watching the parade. I walk for all the people who are not out and who can't be. I walk for the people who are out but not connected. I walk for the people who don't have the time. I walk in tribute to my heroes, the ones who have done so much for my generation already. I walk for the memory of the ones who are no longer with us. I wish that all my reasons for walking were positive. But I also walk because we need to be seen. I walk because it's 2010 and I still hear lesbians and gays putting us down. I walk because people are still trying to tell me that my orientation is a phase, oppressive, for show, not real... I walk to remind you that we are part of this community, too, whether you like it or not. We are not going away. On the contrary. Our community is only growing. Someday, people like this Gawker blogger are going to have to grow up and deal with their ignorance.

By the way, the author of that post can be reached at brian@gawker.com .


nobody said...

I love how Gawker descends into fetishizing bisexual women:

"Yes, there is nothing icky about lady-on-lady action. This is not true with male-on-male intercourse. People are not just disgusted by the people, they're disgusted by the act."

Yeah, and you wonder why bisexual men don't come out very often? Maybe its because sexist bigots like you are persistent in shunning anything non-straight (unless it turns you on, right).

alice said...

I always wonder where I end up landing when the whole 'lady bisexuals are hawt, but none of that icky anal sex!' view comes up. What about bi women who *gasp* have anal sex? Are we downgraded to straight lady-objectification status, or thrown in with the icky, icky gay men? Sigh.

What's even more disappointing is that the author tries to come back at the end with a more pro-queer slant. But you can't come back from that level of 'well, lady bi folks are trivial and just slutty' with 'let's get some bi guys out of the closet!'

Regardless, thank you for marching, and for being a place to come to to get a bit more invigorated for the (seeminly endless) arguments over whether we're real.

kevin strickland said...

Yes, there is nothing icky about lady-on-lady action. This is not true with male-on-male intercourse. People are not just disgusted by the people, they're disgusted by the act."